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Strangers in Our Bed I


Here we lay nose to nose

bare skin exposed,

in the midst of a hurricane 

that dares to destroy what’s taken us years to make. 

We’ve soldiered through many battles, but this disease I can’t take in my home,

not on my own. 

I used to find comfort in being alone,

well acquainted with the pain and the friends it brings. 

Now all of the silence tells me to lapse and bring the long suffering to a cease. 

Boy was I close. 

Let me go back on the vows I’ve made

and we’ve got a bigger issue to face,

past the scars that are placed 

on the most modest bodies in weak moments to escape. 

Don’t know where to place the blame 

but I know if I take another hit, I’m bound to cave. 

We don’t talk anymore

I can feel the guilt creeping in,

I see it in your face,

didn’t know the cries for help and concerns would put us in an even darker place. 

My beloved is so brave to take advantage of a good heart and drag it across months of anxious warnings and fears that fought its way past these tears,

all of which played a part in why we’ve been distant these years. 

How did we end up here?

Trace back to good memories that have brought us greater fears,

so I ponder if they were ever there. 

I question why I’m going back to traumatic events only to try and save what’s here. 

I pray for the woman I was when we met. 

Lord knows she’s still in here 

fighting to be heard,

longing for the touch of a man who spoke genuine love and confessions,

who blindly followed the lead of her loves regardless of his direction. 

Naive enough to believe she could pray away the dark clouds and depression. 

If everything else is taken away,

my love will never change, rather its lack of conditions. 

But you’ve drug me down to darker pits and places I can’t remain. 

I pray for us as one, wishing we could escape the pain regardless of its deeper meaning. 

Transition into the afterlife and visit you when you’re dreaming,

get ahold of those nightmares that keep you screaming. 

For the time being, 

forgive me for my selfish concerns and fill me with well wishes.  

Uphold my body with your decor you know it so greatly misses. 

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